Andy's Rant Pages
(Television And The Media)
Those annoying split screen with the tiny ending credits:
Do you remember when you could see the ending credits of a TV show and movies on the networks in the way that it was meant to be seen and sing/hum/whistle along to the music? That wasn't too long ago but that is coming to an end thanks to NBC, the network that pioneered this degrading practice in the 1994 fall season. CBS soon followed suit, then ABC, and FOX in the 1995 spring season. Now WB has jumped on the bandwagon. NBC is the worst offender not just because it was the originator but the fact that every NBC show (whether it's news, sports, Saturday morning programs, etc.) must have that annoying split screen with the tiny ending credits. ABC and CBS are also using it for their daytime lineup. Remember when you could hum along to The Young and The Restless theme during the ending credits? Now do you see what I am trying to say? NBC never allows any commercial time between any of their programs (The ending credits of one show immediately switches to the next show). The other networks do it part of the time. This is extremely frustrating and irritating for those who record multiple shows to keep on separate videotapes (i.e. Friends/Jesse and Malcolm in the Middle/Ally McBeal) because it is virtually impossible to stop the VCR at the end of those annoying split screen with the tiny ending credits, eject the videotape, insert another videotape, and press the record button in time before the next show starts unless you have at least two VCRs. It is also aggravating if you are setting the VCR timer. You would need to add extra time (i.e. 8:59-10:01= 2 extra minutes) in order to make sure to get the entire show even when you think you've synchronized the VCR clock with the network's clock. Are the networks trying to keep people people from recording programs TO KEEP?
Those annoying split screen with the tiny ending credits definitely ruin the original quality of a show because it is not the way that the show was supposed to be seen. I have a constant grudge towards NBC ever since they cancelled Quantum Leap in 1993 and this is not making me feel any better. My gripe with the annoying split screen with the tiny ending credits on CBS is that it has a bad habit of speeding up at the end. They think we can read it as fast as Data the android from Star Trek: The Next Generation. The networks are treating the ending credits like if it was a caboose of a train. Why can't the networks do the plugs before or after the original ending credits? I assume that the original ending credits are still there because we would eventually see them when the shows end up in syndication land and/or home video. Viewers in other countries get to see the same American shows with the original ending credits! Why are the networks wasting their time, labor, and effort to cut the original ending credits and use those annoying plugs with the tiny ending credits? Heck, if they are that desperate, why not just do a split screen for the entire show to free up more commercial time? If the networks want to run plugs for their other shows, that fine with me but NOT during the ending credits! I'm the type of person who stays in the movie theater during the ending credits! Anyway, The networks are denying the viewers to the real, original thing! Please don't tolerate this practice by letting them know that you want quality and nothing less will be acceptable. Otherwise we would soon be living in a Max Headroom world.
If any couch potatoes out there in America still do not know what I am talking about, I hope that you all saw Schindler's List when it aired without any commercial interruptions and very minimal editing on NBC. They actually showed the original ending credits! This has to be the first time since the end of the 1993-94 season that NBC didn't do a split screen! I think that Steven Spielberg would not want the film shown in any other way. I just wished that all studios and/or directors would demand that the networks not tamper with the ending credits of their programs.
Also, isn't anyone upset that the original ending credits with the ending scene where Ben Affleck's character marries Liv Tyler's character in Armageddon was completely cut out and replaced with that ever annoying split screen ending credits when it aired on ABC?
Links to other rants about Network TV:
Sign the petition asking the US TV Networks to restore commercial time between shows.
Society for a Logo Free T.V.
Kill The Bug
Another reason why I hate NBC is that they are the only remaining network who refuses to adopt the "Fox Box" (i.e. the little tiny scoreboard, clock, etc.) on the upper corner of the TV screen to help the viewers. I am glad that they lost the broadcast rights to NFL games after the 1998 season and that CBS finally started broadcasting the games with the info (CBS calls it the "Eye Box") on the corner of the TV screen. NBC has this attitude of wanting to lead and not follow except when it benefits them and not the viewers. The only time NBC has followed was when they started putting the NBC logo bug at the lower right of the TV screen and their own big money game show (Twenty One, Weakest Link and Deal or No Deal).
The U.S. TV news media not allowing foreign languages to be spoken in its entirety:
It's extremely annoying that the U.S. TV news media doesn't allow foreign languages to be completely spoken? Why can't they just put subtitles on the bottom so it would benefit both English and the foreign language that is being spoken? It would also make people learn how to read in the United States. I have seen them do it for poorly spoken and hard to understand English but I think they are just too stubborn to do it for foreign languages. On the other hand, Chinese and Taiwanese news media such as Chinese Television Network allows the person to speak freely in his or her native language without interpreter voice over interruption by using the subtitles instead. The natives from non English speaking countries just want to actually see how well of a translation job the interpreter did. Isn't that fair enough?
Selfish/greedy game show contestants:
Why does a JEOPARDY! contestant who is in the lead purposely backstabs his/her opponent by winning the game by only $1 ESPECIALLY IF IT'S HIS/HER 5TH AND FINAL DAY? Is there a rule against having 2 or (if I'm pushing it) even all 3 winning contestants with the same score? Geeze! I mean, what kind of satisfaction does anyone get by not making Merv Griffin, Sony, and King World cough up more money to pay for a co-winner? Where else in the world can you make someone else very happy for just $1? If you want to win, please win by more than $1. Why not bet it all? I mean, even if you calculate your winning wager to be $1 over your nearest challenger's score if he/she was to bet it all and succeed, you would lose if you had failed to answer correctly. Obviously this would not apply if your score is at least double the amount of your nearest opponent at the end of DOUBLE JEOPARDY!
(Also, how come the winning JEOPARDY! contestant never flinches at the amount of money he/she has won unlike the typical TPIR contestant?)
Is it just me that I am too nice of a person? My philosophy is for wealth and happiness to spread to everyone (AND I DON'T MEAN GOVERNMENT OVERTAXING THE RICH)! The world would be a much better place that way.
Contestants who've never watched The Price is Right on a regular basis:
These are the idiots who don't understand how to play Check Game, Ten Chances, Make Your Move, Clock Game, etc. (HINT: All prices of prizes in Ten Chances end with a "0" [ZERO] unless there isn't one which would usually be the first 2 digit valued prize.) Hey! Even my late grandmother who couldn't speak English knew how to play Ten Chances so there's just no excuse! They need to watch the show to learn unless they're one of the first contestants to play a new game! (1997-1998 new games: It's in the Bag, Fortune Hunter) Besides that, THEY DON'T NEED TO BE THERE WASTING TIME WHILE CAUSING SOMEONE ELSE WHO KNOWS THE GAMES THE CHANCE TO WIN! Hey, if you are going to Los Angeles to be in The Price Is Right audience, please go to this web site on how to win on various TPIR games. If you ever get called to "Come on down!", you'll know that it will not be a wasted opportunity.
Some commercials:
The Snack Wells commercials bother me with those ladies terrorizing the "Cookie Man". Have those ladies ever pay for the stuff they swipe from him?
All commercials in general showing that the person(s) or animal(s) not paying for the merchandise.
The American Standard commercial with the greedy man from the electric company who just loves to sting people with high electric bills. When he goes to Mrs. Johnson's house to check the meter, he is surprised to see how low the meter is registering. He begins to suspect something is wrong and walks around the corner of the house to see that Mrs Johnson recently installed an American Standard Central Air Conditioner. We promptly hear the man scream in agony. I think that in the real world people from the electric company would prefer you to save and not waste electricity. I don't think they are paid by commission as hintly depicted in the American Standard commerical. If everyone wasted electricity especially in the summer, then the electric company couldn't keep up with demand and that some temporary rolling blackouts would have to be enforced just like what California is presently suffering from.
Automobile commercials because you seem to encounter them most in a single day. They all seem to expect you to buy a car or truck for every commercial that you encounter. I can't seem to go through a day without having these commercials bug me. I don't think that even Bill Gates (Former Microsoft CEO) can buy a car or truck for every automobile commercial he encounters. Wait a minute! I take that back. I believe that he can! Didn't he make $50 billion in 1999 which if divided by 2000 hours a year and divided by 60 minutes an hour makes it at over $416,666 a minute! I envy him! I wish that he would donate what he makes in one minute to me! I could fund my invention and start up my own business.
Expensive 900 number commercials such as Psychic Friends Network. I wish I made $3.99 a minute! Heck, even if I made that much I wouldn't spend a dime a minute on PFN. I think what is really irritating me is Dionne Warwick doing those PFN commercials.
Commercials that modify original songs like "Nacho Man" ("Macho Man"), "S.A.L.S.A." ("Y.M.C.A."), etc.
Prescription medication commercials and the growing number of these commercials. Why advertise medicines that you can't get without a Doctor's prescription? It's kinda stupid.
(OLD COMMERCIAL RANTS BELOW)
How can the Energizer Bunny be so hard to capture and how could it still be running on the same battery since 1989?
A Dockers commercial where some rude jackass rams his way out of the subway car and causing two potential couples to split up. Ahem, there is a word called "excuse me" in the English language!
A Wrigley's Spearmint gum commercial with the guy in the airplane. You can reach that stick of gum by pulling up on the pant sleeve!
Extra sugarfree gum with the idiots who missed seeing the action while digging for another piece of another brand of saccharin laced gum. Geeze, how coincidential! How stupid! Their commercials include a lady who missed seeing a whale's tail and the astronomer who missed the "once in 75 year" fireball.
I like just about every "Got milk?" commercial except the one with the Aaron Burr trivia where the radio station calls up this guy who knows the answer in the middle of eating something. Look, if $10,000 is at stake, I would spit the food out of my mouth. I'll worry about the mess later. I hope MAD TV would do a parody of this commercial where the guy does spit out the food. The commercial could be called "Got brains?"!
The Ray Ban sunglasses commercial with the vampires at sunrise. One of the vampires forgot his Ray Ban sunglasses and we see his body spontaneously combust. One of the other vampires says "Sombody forget his Ray Ban sunglasses?" and pulls out a spare pair of Ray Ban sunglasses. Then all the vampires in the group laughs. He could have used that spare pair of Ray Ban sunglasses to save his vampire friend's life but NOOOOOOOO! He and his vampire cohorts just wanted to see one of his vampire friends die. How nice of them!
The hungry lost beggar in the Mazola commercial. Is he really lost and hungry? I doubt it. If I was lost and hungry, I wouldn't care about what kind of oil is used to fry that chicken drumstick.
Hollywood portraying New Orleans people and other Hollywood stuff that annoys me:
Oooh! I Just hate it when Hollywood thinks that everyone in New Orleans talk with a Southern accent! That is just totally baloney! (imitating southern accent) Hey y'all want tu cume tu Nu Orleans n hear how we axually sownd lyke wen we speak? The truth is that just about NOBODY in New Orleans speaks like that. New Orleans is the exception of all the Southern cities where it's a gumbo of different people partly because it's the 2nd largest port city in the United States. The people here actually speak with a light New York-Boston accent mix! Did anybody catch American Idol 4 when the audition show was in New Orleans? Not everybody who auditioned spoke with a country accent. You have to go to the rural areas outside of New Orleans to get people who speak with a country accent like Lindsey Cardinale of Ponchatoula.
For more information on how to speak like a true New Orleanian, please click here.
For the other Hollywood stuff that annoys me, how come is it always disaster whenever brakes on a vehicle get cut? How come the driver can never think of any one of these emergency options: shifting into a lower gear and then into Neutral, gradually pull the emergency brakes, and/or turn off the ignition? (Be careful not to lock the steering wheel.)
Another rant is Sitcoms where the characters somehow get themselves on a game show. They always screw up! Why don't we have Sitcoms where the characters gets rich? I thought that Roseanne's family winning the lottery was finally a break from tradition, but it was all a dream.
(There's more to come so don't forget to stop by often!)
ANDY'S RANT PAGES Other rants beside television and the media.
Visit my other web sites!
Last modified on Sunday, August 6, 2006.